cfsmtb in low earth orbit

Saturday, December 31, 2005

Hair of the Cat

Kicked by GoatsImage courtesy of eclectech

2006- Year of the Dawg? Pfffffffffff!

"In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this." - Terry Pratchett

Even tickle tummys cats!

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

When Cat Eyes Are Smiling

Slainte! *Hic*Mraow! Just wee drop of cow juice...

This entry really does belong over at beer & kittys, but I am petulantly flinging down the gauntlet to hippy

cfsmtb management proudly presents....Irish Cat Drinking Songs by Marc Gunn & The Dubliners' Tabby Cats
Are you a cat lover? Do you love to Irish drinking songs? New CD for the wonderfully demented kitty cat fantatic. Listen to music you've heard on St. Patrick's Day rewritten about cats.
This morning I woke up with Torre, my grey tabby cat, sleeping on my legs. His head perked up. His eyes were fixed in the direction of the bedroom door. In walked Tiziano, my brown tabby. I could feel Torre's legs brace against me and saw his ears fall back. Then *vroosh* with a magnificent leap he flew at Tiziano and tackled him. Tiziano shot up and raced away. What inspiration! It's moments like those that inspired me to record a CD for cat lovers like me.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Gotta get me one of these

DisplayChandelierRight round round round, You spin me right round, baby

Bike fiends have this never ceasing compulsion to wax lyrical over components and technology. Carbon fibre p0rn vs. steel. Latest techy developments vs. retrogrouch simplicity. Gears vs.Singlespeed. Lance vs. Jan. Gels vs. snakes. ahem. Now if you know moi, you'll know I'm extraordinarily capable of building a version of this lovely chandelier (look up, ah there it is..). And also equally capable of attaching the finished construction to a bike helmet & hooning around city environs with it on my head. Why not, shall it be yet another project for 2006, regardless of all my 'other' numerous bike projects, still in hiatus? Never fear though, their time will come. One day.

Final Goatage for 2005 this evening down at River Street. We'll attempt to put in a brief appearance, though ribbage is still dodgy. As mentioned below in a previous comment, the pain threshold has gone from FECK to OH SHIT and currently diminishing to AH BUGGER. Unfortunately since the crash, I've been infected by a pesky cold + cough. Hence that's making the healing process ever so more delightful.

strongkittyOne, two, three, four. Tired yet?

Fellow blogger and bike fiend m!key has also had a nasty off, so pop over and write a cheery note. Hopefully this weekend I'll be ok enough to attach the roadie to the wind trainer & turn the legs over, as
Amys Ride is only a few short weeks away. Several WoJ/aus.bicycle folk are doing either the 45km or 120km. If you're interested, the organisers are still accepting entries up to Christmas. And there's wild rumours that L*n*e maybe there. Better hide that Livewrong bracelet!

In closing, please most feel feel to peruse my other prattlings on teh interwebbie. There's something for everyone, with insane kittys and two rather sensible offerings. Who's that chick in the cowboy hat standing next to a local pollie, a mayor, and Other Important People? See, that proves I can be sensible and all grown up. On my terms, of course.

P.S: Enjoy this video

Monday, December 12, 2005

Wrathful H*tm*t Gods Smite Thee Down

Helmet GodsAnother word or two from our overlords

This is really last weeks news, but effects linger on. And on and on and on. Basically yours truly was flung slightly into low earth orbit last Saturday evening whilst journeying home from Melb Cup on Wheels. That was an awesome nights entertainment at Vodaphone - now I'm wondering how future CI events will go up at DISC? Back to our tale of woe.

Saturday was indeed a Perfect Evening, until a kittycat ran in front of me. Yes, I had an Off - due to Avoiding A Cat. Not a road rage incident, not a clueless cager, not a 4WD or truck.

A Cat.

Chain of events: Furtive kitty darts out across Union Street as I turn towards a side street. To avoid hitting kitty, I grab a handful of brake, and a lethal combination of Salsa cyclocross levers & Shimano 600 brakes proceeded to do their duty. E
ndo on front wheel, landing directly on noggin, straight over while clipped in & falling heavily on leftside in tangled mess. The tangled mess remained prostrate on Union Street, as it had winded itself and thought it wiser to lay near the gutter and look up at the stars. After a few minutes the tangled mess got it's breath back, found the other bike shoe (still clipped into pedal), wiggled it's fingers & toes and duly discovered many things, did indeed HURT. Many many thx to Pete for being an absolute gentleman, who received my panicked SMS, doubled back & escorted moi home.

The important stuff: Bike
Tears in brand new red tape on bullhorns, the barend shifters incurred damage. BTW, does anyone tips on how to protect these plastic levers? Normal wear n' tear aside I think they're gonna end up stuffed within a relatively short period. Long rip in leather Speed-She saddle, but believe this can be repaired. Oh, and one rear pocket on sleeveless jersey ripped badly. H*lm*t could be stuffed - two dents. And the lovely Bikesoiler was up at Kona 24. So I had to sook quietly in solitude until his return on Sunday evening, and also pass on National BBQ Day @ CERES.

Hindsight: while at Vodaphone I recall briefly chattering away about how h*lm*ts may have lead to a decrease in cycling rates since they became compulsory circa 1991.

We do, we do!
Further note:
I do not believe in conspiracies or supersitions, but can have paranoid tendencies. I ask you, what's the likelihood that H*lm*t Gods overheard my offhand remarks, and then quickly conspired with the Cat Gods to directly send moi a message to Shut The Feck Up?

So it's a week on and I'm still in a World of
shit Pain. And it's my birthday today. What a delightful welcome to early middle age...feck me chocolate. want chocolate. want chocolate NOW. Cancel Christmas, I'm off the bike for at least 2-3 weeks with cracked ribs. FECK. whinge rant moan ... cfsmtb wanders off muttering incoherently and has another little rest

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Bring the Aeolian Ride to Melbourne!

LA Night RideImage from Aeolian Night Ride in Los Angeles, a bicycle event we're helping to bring to Melbourne, read on ...

What is it?
Aeolian Ride is a free mass participatory bike ride with 52 inflatable costumes. Inspired by bike love, inflatables, human energy and public involvement with art, this ride transforms the memories of ordinary streets from everyday to a fantastic kinetic landscape - a playground of windfilled shapes.

Where does it happen?
So has plans to go to cities around the world. So far this ride has taken place in New York, San Francisco and Cape Town South Africa, and Los Angeles where the first night ride happened. Aeolian Ride is making an effort to come to Australia this February 2006.

Why it is free?
The artist, Jessica Findley, believes that the Aeolian ride should be free to the public. In and effort to keep it that way, Jessica has paid for the entire project except for the grant she received from the Black Rock Arts Foundation which, to date, covered 16% of current costs. Online donations and poster purchases thus far have covered 5% of the costs.

Aeolian RideHow You Can Help Make it Happen

All of the rides are made possible with the help of locals with a connection an existing bike culture and an interest in volunteering to help organize. Volunteer organizers help spread the word, find the path, look for funding, help find volunteer photographers and videographers and possibly helping to organize an after party. Volunteer safetly riders help riders suit up, keep the riders safe in traffic and guide the riders. Photographer's and videographer's documentation is essential to the process of preserving the ride for past present and future riders.

Any support that can be made available to support the ride helps to bring it to new locations and is greatly appreciated. Another great help is accommodation and bike loans. Please contact Jessica at if you are able host the her and her #1 helper and/or loan them bikes for 1 or 2 weeks. If you know of any available grants for the ride to apply to please contact Jessica. If you would like to donate funds or buy a poster to help support the ride you can do so at

See the photos and video of the ride - and sign up to be notified about the details of the ride Hope to inflate you soon!


Previous cileo post: Latest Aeolian Ride - Cape Town So if yer game for inflatable February fun, also email moi as well, if you can assist locally with any of the requests Jessica mentioned.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Angel of the Mountains

Charly Gaul, 1958 Tour de France winnerA different time, place, TdF race

Tour de France and Giro d'Italia winner Charly Gaul died in hospital on Tuesday after suffering a pulmonary embolism. The Luxembourg rider, who took the Tour title in 1958 plus victories in the 1956 and 1959 Giri d'Italia, was one of the best climbers in the history of cycling and twice took the Tour's King of the Mountains award. He was the first rider from outside Italy to win the Giro. Gaul, known as the 'Angel of the Mountains', became ill after he recently fell at his home in Itzig in Luxembourg. He would have been 73 on Thursday. VeloNews :: Cycling Hall of Fame

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Silly Duffers

DufferUsed Car Salesman?
Messers Duffy & Pascoe: would you buy a used car from these flash cnuts blokes?
Off yer bike - for the sake of all of us on the roads
It's time to get bikes off our roads. As a mainstream form of transport, the bicycle has proved itself the equivalent of communism: a lovely idea that failed dismally in practice. Bikes are dangerous to ride and slow traffic, which creates more pollution. For the good of all of us, we need to ban the bike.

*ahem* *cough* Now where was I .... cfsmtb management cannot add anything further of significance to this dialogue, other than what's been previously mentioned about Messers Duffy and Pascoes neo-surrealist anti-cycling diatribes. SMH readers feedback said it all. Mondays Crikey email included several ripper Your Say comments. Oh, referring to the immature images featured above, one indulged in estimated 30 seconds tweaking around in 'shop. And I humbly realise this is nowhere near Fluteys extraordinary expertise.

Final bookends on the subject: we present the obligatory
aus.bicycle saga, and the Crème de la Crème with Farkins *Insert childish farting noise here*. A superb critique.

Lite relief, yesterday we also indulged in a spot of subtle monkeywrenching (ie: the "find - replace" function) and scored at least one sucker. tee-hee. In more serious bicycle advocacy news, pop over to Bicycle Justice for Team WoJ plans at Januarys Amys Ride. Also I'll have a update soon regarding The Wrath of the H*lm*t Gods incurred riding home from Melbourne Cup on Wheels. Not comfortable reading. Are some cyclists being monitored by an malignant omnipresent force..? With luck, by this time tomorrow, my normal bodily functions should return with the ability to (a). breath deeply (b). sneeze without pain (c). bend normally.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

All Live!!! All Nude!!!

... Cats ...

Ladies & Gents, I bid you all a delightful weekend ...